Daddy's Voice

from 5/27/08

I added to my iTunes/iPod playlist some old Randy Travis songs. I’m not really a big country music fan at all. It wasn’t until I moved to upstate New York for school, where I was both so very lonely for my daddy and Texas that I “discovered” Mr. Travis. That music made me feel not quite so adrift.

Eventually I got a best girlfriend and had her hooked too. I remember driving back from a quasi-hip night club with her late at night with songs like “Its Just a Matter of Time” blaring on the stereo. We’d be singing at the top of our lungs. It was such different music we’d just left... I personally enjoyed the dichotomy of those evenings.

Eagerly this morning I played my newest additions as I started my day. Nearly 20 years later, I still know all the words. And I still smiled as I heard “Is It Still Over.”

For sure I still think of my daddy. Not just that my father was a big country music fan but in Randy’s depth of voice and the “twang”. A big thing also is the lyrics... Several of the songs use the exact same phrasing Daddy uses as well as self-depreciating humor. I hadn’t realized until just now how very much I am reminded of Daddy by this music.

Then it hit me... His voice and words also reminded me of another man back home. The man who I consider to be one of the greatest love of my life. I never had realized just how similar he and Daddy’s speech patterns were! They are also the two men that have loved me passionately for who I am.

It made me wonder... Is one of the reasons I fell in love first with Randy Travis then later with the man I mention above... Is it because of how I always felt being around my daddy? Loved and accepted for me?